The Midlife Morning Routine that Makes me Feel Amazing!
And no, it doesn't involve waking up at 5am, God forbid!
I have never been a morning person—confirmed by my childhood Snoopy mug which said ‘I hate people who sing in the morning.’ Ironic then, that between the ages of 10 and 15-years-old, I would be swimming laps in a cold pool by 5.30am 5 days a week! I was a childhood swimming champ and that was the bonkers schedule you had to adhere to if you wanted to be the best.
Discovering the joy of boys and parties eventually put an end to my Olympic dream along with the 5.30am training sessions. You’d have thought after that, that a normal wake up time would be easy peasy for me after being used to dragging myself out of my warm pit at dawn for years, but no! Whether it was because I’d been denied lie-ins for so long, or my hormones were working overtime to transform me from teen to adult, it wasn’t long before I’d decided that sleep was the best thing in the world and my bed was where it was at! Waking at 8am for sixth form was a struggle. I would sleep through the alarm and snuggle down under my cosy, flouncy BHS duvet until my mum’s voice, calling to me up the stairs, got to siren level. My usual weekend wake-up time was 1pm and my friends knew not to call me before then—unless it was an emergency such as bumping into my latest crush in the local Woolies and him asking about me!
My love affair with sleep and dread of early mornings was still going strong into my twenties—until motherhood came along to turn my world upside down.
From Sleeping-In to Sleepless Nights
When I was first pregnant at 26, I remember overhearing the worried chat between my mum and sister, along the lines of: “But she always sleeps through her alarm - how will she hear when the baby is crying at night?” By month 8, I was so huge and uncomfortable in bed that getting any amount of sleep was almost impossible. This wasn’t helped by the fact that every time I did manage to drop off, I needed to get up again for the loo. I’m sure this is Mother Nature’s way of getting you used to what’s to come with a new baby. Once Aimee arrived, I was so in love, #StressedHusband and I used to purposely stay away to watch her sleep—then see who could be the first one to get to her when she woke up! Motherhood does weird things to us, doesn’t it? Of course, that nocturnal madness didn’t last long—by the time she was 4-months-old, I would have sold my soul for an unbroken night’s sleep. Then, of course, babies 2 and 3 came along to remind me lie-ins were definitely a thing of the past.
Eventually, the kids became more independent. They figured out how to use the TV remote and pour themselves a bowl of Coco Pops and weekend lie-ins (well, a lesser version of them) could resume—at least for a little while. But even more exhausting than those sleepless nights with a colicky newborn was the torture of sleep deprivation when my kids became teenagers, just old enough to go out with friends at night. I’ll never forget the agony of desperately wanting to close my eyes but staying wide awake because one or more of them were out, and they might need a lift home if things didn’t go to plan (too much cider, perhaps?). I couldn’t rest until I knew they were home safely.
My mind would race with all sorts of catastrophic scenarios about what could be happening at their friends’ parties. Eventually, I’d doze off clutching my phone—just in case they called—only to jerk awake with the imprint of it on my face when the front door finally slammed, signalling their safe return.
The 3AM Wake-Up Call No One Warned Me About
After a few years of smooth sailing in the sleep department, along came perimenopause to remind me just how life-wrecking lack of sleep can be. The 3am wake-up call from the dastardly duo— anxiety and hot flush— was alarming because back then, I didn’t even know what perimenopause was! Until I got settled into a routine with HRT, restless nights and waking up with huge dark circles and a mood like thunder were the norm.
Thankfully, after all these years of battling my body clock, I’ve finally found a morning routine that helps me feel my best mentally and physically. And it doesn’t mean becoming a member of the 5am club *shudders* so popular nowadays with wellness devotees.
My Marvellous Morning Routine
I never knew just how much small tweaks to your morning routine could impact your mood and energy levels for the rest of the day. It is one of the easiest and best things I’ve done to help me feel balanced and happier—especially in the SAD inducing winter days, which I’ve always struggled with.
Another great thing about it is, that even though I might scroll Instagram accounts or listen to wellbeing podcasts which often impart some seriously good healthy habits that would be in my best interest to follow, knowing me, I probably won’t. I mean, who has time to do ALL the healthy things, right? But knowing that I have my simple morning routine, that makes me feel great is enough for me—and if I ever feel like bringing any other wellness habits or hacks into my life, then that’s a bonus. So, my simple feel-good morning goes like this:
Wake at the same time everyday (not including weekends 👀) Research shows that waking up at the same time every morning is beneficial because it helps regulate your body’s natural sleep-wake cycle (circadian rhythm). Doing this improves sleep quality and helps improve physical and mental health during the day. As a freelancer, I could vary my wake-up times as I can start work whenever it suits me, but I still prefer to wake at the same time.
I swapped my alarm tone from a body-jerking hooter, to a gentle, crystal tinkling sound and it made such a difference! Instead of jumping out of my skin with my rudely awakened brain looking round for danger (which actually defeated the object and often made me slump back down with a huge ‘phew!’ and go back to sleep when I realised the coast was clear) I now feel as if my senses are being softly stroked awake.
While I’m still in a dreamy, relaxed state and I haven’t yet spiralled with thoughts of to-do lists and beating myself up about not getting to the gym the day before, I get intentional with my body and mind. I spend 2-5 minutes sitting up against my pillows, doing a 3, 4, 5 breathing technique (in for 3, hold for 4, exhale for 5) to hold on to the feeling of calmness before the day starts.
I get out of bed, have a lovely stretch and tell my reflection in the mirror: “Lis—you’ve got this girl! It’s going to be an amazing day!” Then, I smile at myself (trying my hardest not to be negative about the crumply old face) before heading to the shower. I’ve found that negative self-talk in the morning can start a chain reaction and spill over to the rest of your day, making you feel less than worthy.
I bet you thought I was going to talk about having a cold shower next, didn’t you? Well I’m not. I do know about the benefits of cold water therapy, but I don’t want to inflict any pain on my calm body in the morning. That said, After my lovely warm shower, I run a flannel under icy cold water and lay it on my face for 30 seconds. It’s a great zingy wake-up for a tired face, tightens pores and makes it feel firmer. At the weekends, when I have more time, I’ll use my ice-ball facial rollers or dunk my face in a bowl of icy water for added K-POW! The ice-facial is a thing—here’s what Jennifer Aniston has to say on the matter:
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Simple skincare, face massage and makeup give me confidence for the day ahead. I spend roughly 5-10 minutes on my skincare and makeup routine if it’s a week day, but at weekends I often spend longer on skincare—incorporating a longer Face Yoga session—but leave my face makeup free and I’ll dive deeper into this for another post. If you’re a midlife woman who has no intention of faffing around with a 12-step skincare regime and fiddling with applying flicky eyeliner—I’m your gal! For work days, I’m all about the quick, effective tips, tricks and products that get me from Eeew to Yee-ha as fast as possible.
Hot water and lemon—I don’t think I’ve missed a morning glass in years. There’s conflicting opinion on whether this adds any benefit to your health, but for me, I love it! Obviously, a tall glass of water—hot or cold—is going to help hydrate the body and in the morning I find hot water (with lemon) more palatable and easier to drink than plain water. Lemons also contain vitamin C and antioxidants which makes me feel I’m doing something healthy for my body.
While I wait for the kettle to boil, I do press-ups against the kitchen worktop and a few squats. Probably barely enough to make any difference, but I’m of the mind that every little helps! Stack them up daily and it’s got to be better than nothing.
The dog walk at my beautiful local park or the nearby river is my daily saviour. I can leave the house in a foul mood (usually, if a rare hot-flush has disrupted my sleep) and I can guarantee, when I return from the walk after an hour or so, my mood and energy levels are elevated and I’m ready to start the day. It’s a fabulous added bonus if my friends join me—we always find something to laugh about.
A large cappuccino on the dog-walk is also a must-have but never first thing.
So there you have it! And proof that my simple morning habits work—I woke up yesterday, skipped nearly all the things and felt horrendous for most of the day. If you’re looking for an easy way to lift your mood and get your body into some sort of action for the day, you might want to give it a try. And if you have your own morning routine, I’d love to know what helps you!
I am not a morning person. It's not something you can force yourself into doing willingly, and being "retired" means i have a fair bit of control over my schedule. If I've slept well, 8 a.m. is an okay start to the day. If i haven't, i may rot in bed til 10 or later. I spend the first hour after waking mostly just drinking coffee and hating. There's got to be a better way, but what? How? 😄
Great post. I am still looking for my midlife morning routine!